Dear George Clooney,
You're witty, sarcastic, and sharp. In fact, you remind me of myself. Except there is one glaring difference, you are an extremely good-looking, famous, rich guy. Ok, that was four glaring differences. Anyway, my point being that: 1) even though people may not get your jokes any more often than they get mine, they are more willing to fake-laugh for you, 2) you are able to criticize the ludicrousness of modern American society without people thinking you are mean (I attribute this mainly to the fact that you are very good looking and people don't want to believe that anyone who is pretty can be mean).
So, George Clooney, lesson learned. I will try to be better looking.
Your #1 Fan